The Woman In Green

I first saw her, when I noticed
My lover smile at someone new.
She was clothed in deep green,
Her eyes dancing with a brilliant sheen.

She had dark, deep green eyes.
They crinkled up at the corners,
Driving many a sane man crazy.
And now, her sole target was me.

I wondered what my lover had
To tell the man smiling at her.
She was even dancing with him.
My face became set, hard, grim.

The woman in green laughed -
A delightful, tinkling sound.
Her eyes shone, capturing me
Now, she was the only one I could see.

I offered to dance with the lady.
She came to my arms without
Much ado. Her soft hands touched
Invitingly - it was just too much!

My eyes darted to my lover.
She was looking up adoringly
At the man. I gritted my teeth -
Miss Green must have seen me seethe.

Her hands curved behind my back,
Molding my muscles, my flesh.
She was lush, soft like a ripe peach.
Many a lesson in love she could teach!

My lover looked at me and smiled.
I pretended I hadn't noticed her.
This woman was getting under my skin,
She was raining little kisses on my jaw, my chin.

My lover was completely ignored.
Of course, I was quite angry with her.
Thanks to the allure of the woman in green,
I was behaving like a boy in his teens!

My eyes could not leave her face.
Her green, green eyes, or her red lips.
She smiled enchantingly, batted her lashes.
She was all over me like an allergy or rashes!

And suddenly, it struck me, the plain truth -
Why the mad, crazy anger covering my eyes.
The woman in green had gotten to me,
Her hand was on my heart, where it shouldn't be.

I pushed her away, like she was the plague.
She reared up, her face severely distorted
In fierce anger. How did I find her beautiful?
How did I feel the attractive, magnetic pull?

I walked, purposefully, to my lover.
I took her in my arms, hugged her close.
My lover whispered fervently that she loved me.
I looked around, Green was nowhere to be seen!

Lady in green

Behold all the splendor
A lady wee and tender
Winds wishper in her ears
Flowers dance with her
Grasshoppers play violins
Birds sing songs from within
Sun in the sky forgets to shine
Enraptured;
Look at this lady so fine!
Moon reflects her beauty
Stars decorates her hair
Rivers gushes forth
As she laughs in mirth
Behold the lady in green
The queen;
Our mother earth

The Woman In Me

My male friends could only see
The total tomboy that was me.
But who would see the woman within?
She, who was wondering what could've been
Had she been bestowed with more femininity.

And then suddenly he appeared,
And unexpectedly, I feared
Losing my heart to someone who
Might not find me woman enough too.
And suddenly, I knew, a change had neared.

He allayed my fears, laid them to rest.
He held me so close to his broad chest,
As he whispered sweet nothings, and laughed
His rumbling laugh, or so casually scoffed
When I said I wasn't a woman at my best.

Now I know why I was just another boy,
Why I didn't shyly smile, or just act coy,
Among my little group of friends, mostly males,
To whom I wasn't a woman from the fairy tales.
I was just another guy, whom they could tease and annoy.

But to him, I was something else, a woman.
Alien to me, were all such ideas under the sun!
I'd never known the importance I've had for so long.
He gave me something I still hold close, a beautiful song.
A heart-wrenching melody, a song I've never sung.

He has awakened the woman that I should be.
He stood strong and unleashed, unflinchingly,
The power that I'd never known I'd possessed.
He just smiled when I said, I never could've guessed,
There was such a strong, beautiful woman in me.

The Woman In Me

The woman in me

Needs to look
beyond horizons.
Wants to fly
In the golden sky
Embalzoned.

The woman in me..

Needs to dream
In colors of a rainbow
Beauty aglow
Wants to reach
Pinnacles.

The woman in me

Dances in rain
With kids on the lane
Sings with the birds
Songs absurd
Undeterred.

The woman in me

Waiting to utter
Feelings aflutter
Slowly unfolding
secrets multifold
Behold!

The woman in me

The Master Of Disguise

A tiny hand sneaked up, and slowly
Picked out two cookies from the box.
He ate them with relish, and narrowly
Missed getting caught. Mommy asked -
"Johnny, have you taken a cookie or two?"
Johnny shook his head, a little too quickly.
"Oh, little boy, now, you aren't lying, are you?"
Mommy groaned. He looked up at her sweetly.
"Mommy, I'm hungry, may I take a cookie?"
He asked, innocently. Mommy smiled.
"That's a good boy. Don't ever lie to me,"
She said. He took a little cookie and said,
Solemnly, "I'll never lie, Mommy. I never have."
He watched Mommy put the box in another place.
The Master of Disguise, then, ate just what Mommy gave.
He knew he would come back for more, any way!

Master of disguise

Mask over a mask,
yet another mask
Where in it are you I ask
In corridors of silence
In vales of darkness
Within my heart
Concealment is an art
Your reply, Complete ambivalence

Blinded by your inbuilt rigid walls
My every attempt stalls
To know you better
I end up with a shutter!
Why oh why
why so many insistent lies?
Pretention thousands you devise!

You replied," Yes i have many a masquerades
I do not call spade a spade
Webs of words I create
In many ways I evade!
But for worlds I wouldnt trade
This life I self made"

Survival is the name of the game
Tell me who is to blame?
Its nature that taught me to hide
And the world to be jekyll and hyde!
And now that I am worldly wise
I get a sobriquet of master of disguise ?!!!

Chained

Fettered, handcuffed, inescapably chained;
Hurt, lonely, utterly, irrevocably pained.
A joyful wound, a bittersweet sorrow,
A permanent stamp on all my tomorrows.
It will flow forever in my mind, a perennial river.
I'll remain chained to this sinful burden forever.
I have no more dreams, no more wishes, illusions.
Oh, this isn't just joy or sorrow, but a mind-blowing fusion!

Chained

As I sit behind the gilded bar,
I dream,
About lands so far
Where butterflies dance in glee
And the air you breathe is free.

I notice that the lid is open,
Stealthily I try to break free
Alas, its just a ruse
Tied to my leg, was a noose.

Accompanied by your roaring laughter,
my frenzied dreams did shatter
For you it was just fun
Playing god.. you were my son....

Fettered, with a piece of thread,
Enslaved future, You, I dread.
soon after you lost interest
in me; left in the box
Chained by you
Choked, chained in death..

Ripples

My life was easy, safe, sure.
I was confident, strong, secure.
Then you walked in, and everything
Changed; right now, crocodiles sing,
Dragonflies dance, and I just sit and watch.
Even the elusive butterflies are easier to catch!
I wish I could regret it all; I wish I'd known.
You've turned my safe life upside down.
I never know what's going to happen next.
These days, I'm just not sure what's best.
Why do I feel so new, so fresh, so wonderfully alive?
I just don't care for the depth, I just want to dive!
I'm simply not what I once used to and loved to be.
You've disturbed my calm existence, don't you see?
What other evil, sinister plans have you got, now?
It's my life, not yours, for you to run the show!
Just what else have you got in your crafty mind?
When I wake up tomorrow, what else would I find
That would surprise me more, that would make
Me feel different? Sigh, but then, what is a lake
Without its ripples? And just what would I do
Without my elixir, my darling, my soul - you?

Ripples

Smoldering fire,
simmering desire
Hidden embers
glinting like saphire

Your eyes, an eloquent symphony
Desire and love
Dancing in harmony
Seeking and carassing
me....

Candle lit dinner
Tremulous shimmer
Innocuous innane chatter
Unrestrained laughter

Bubbling emotions
Drowned in wine
Lips to lips
Your hands in mine

Slowly we come closer
Exploring each other
A little more further
I can feel you shudder

Clothes shed unbeknownst
Passions reign,
Reasons cease,
Entwined and lost

Mingling sighs,
jostling thighs
Soaring high
Rising in cresendo

Ripples of pleasure
Ripples of emotions
Ripples in ocean of love

I Walk Alone

Without a doubt or a second thought,
The showers of rain embrace me lovingly.
Yellow and red flowers from the trees fall
Softly on me. An innocent, wee little tot
Smiles dazzlingly at me, as he walks past.
I watch each of the faraway birds circling
The skies, till they become a tiny dot
At the horizon. The blazing evening sun
Is a fierce, red ball, setting, oh, so slowly,
As the moon rises, never to be caught.
The dragonflies fly in delightful harmony.
There is a sign of rain in the sweet, warm air,
With a promise of more, I know not what.
The gentle breeze caresses me, whispering
Little secrets into my keenly listening ear.
Blissful silence and solitude prevail. I do not
Have any kind of company; not a friend
In sight to share the joy I'm feeling with.
As I survey all the beauty that can never be bought,
I simply prefer to walk alone - proudly solitary.

I Walk Alone

On the darkest of darkest night
Scared moon refuses to shine
Every animal every bird bide their time
Waiting.. waiting for light

And I walk alone...

On the treacherous bends
Amidst the crowd, Beneath the shroud
Places where angels or demons
tremble to descend,
Till the world's end

I search for you...

Are you as frantic as me or as alone?
Cold, cold i am ; cold as stone
Wandering through timelessness
Seeking you
Can you hear my clarion call?
My wounded heart's squall !

I beseech you...

On this lonely wintery nox
Lost in inviting nebulous fog
Howling in pain
Going insane..
My red glittering eyes delirious
Crazed and enraged..

I walk alone...

Shadows

As I was sitting in front of the welcoming fireplace,
Staring ahead and nursing a cup of hot tea,
It was the time of the dreadfully long day when
Darkness crept in and the shadows lengthened.

Thinking irrelevant thoughts that didn't matter,
Dreaming unrealistic dreams that didn't make sense,
Feeling hurt and pain that meant nothing to everyone
Else, but me, I knew I was painfully, pathetically alone.

As I mindlessly watched the shadows dance
Their exhilarating dance on the walls of my home,
The realization slowly, but clearly dawned on me -
Shadows are surely friendlier than most people I see.

Shadow

Oh ebullient nebulous you
why do you haunt
me, on the empty corners
the untread unwanted
roads that i walk on

Ever clingling
ever lingering

lengthening with time
when memories visit
On desolate cold nights
Where no one is in sight
you provide
Cold comfort

With you around
I am never alone

You my shadow
my clone
my keeper of secrets
you choke me
Alas, nothing can be done
Till death we are bound!

A Candle In The Wind

I light a small, white, scented candle
In the hope she will burn all night.
Then you come by, forcefully charming,
And soon, nothing is quite all right.
Everything is now too hard to handle.

Each time I see the candlelight
Flickering, dimming, my little heart
Forgets to beat. I can see the candle
Trying to not give in, to do her part,
Putting up a steady, brave fight.

You caress my little scented friend.
You laugh at her valiant efforts.
You whistle away merrily, loudly.
I believe she has become a warrior of sorts.
Oh, just how wicked you are, you evil wind!

I have decided firmly now, enough is enough.
I close the window right on your cruel face,
Manners be damned. My brave candle friend
Now smiles; her glow spreads in a thousand rays -
She would never be blown away by just a huff and puff!

Candle In The Wind

Lost and forlorn
Encompassed in darkness
A lonely soul
trying to stay afloat
against the gales of time
survival so vital
destined to glow
While the vile wind blows
am a candle
Harbinger of hope
dispelling gloom
while dreamflowers bloom
Vigilant till the first ray of sun
Spent, my work is done.

Life - II

From the cradle to the grave,
I've carried so many thoughts, sorrows,
Memories, money I've saved,
Money I've stolen or borrowed.
I've borne the cross of my burdens,
My sufferings, my hurt, my pain,
All the crimes, actions without sense,
Mistakes I've committed. A stain,
A black mark, a dirt on my conscience
That could never be bleached or removed,
I hold within myself. Reminiscences,
Dreams, visions, wishes, hatred, love
I've felt before still burn steady and bright,
In the heart of my hearts, all lost secrets.

Now, as I stand upon my own grave,
Watching myself laid in the coffin,
I wonder what I now, with myself, have.
I wonder what kind of a person I've been.
I see people crying, mourning, lamenting
My loss. I wonder how many of them
Truly miss me, truly wish I was living,
Truly believe they've lost a perfect gem.
I wonder whether any of them loved me.
I wonder why I shouldn't have lived on.
As the people turn back and leave, I see
Their tears have dried. Soon, they're all gone.
I realize I don't regret a moment of my short life.
It's time for me to leave, too; I'm now free to go.

Life - I

THE IGNORANT PHASE.

Life seems meaningless, many tell me.
Everyone agrees (I used to, too) - before they've seen enough of it.
They don't give themselves time to see,
To look around, to make themselves fit
To comment on life, to call it meaningless.
My friends are still too young and ignorant,
Yet they see life as a headache, a pain, too useless.

A NEW KNOWLEDGE DAWNS.

Why do you see life as an answer? - Now, I can't.
Life isn't an answer I already know
To some irrelevant question put to me.
Life's THE question; irrelevant? Not quite so.
Life's the question, asking me what I want to be.
I still don't know the answer; I'm still wondering.
I think of it everyday, yet I don't know -
What meaning to my life shall I bring?
Shall I die without making sense? I don't think so.
I'm not so bothered about what happened then
Nor about tomorrow or any day after that.
I've stopped bothering about my looks, men,
About what others think about me, this and that.

STILL BETTER.

Halt - I still don't know the answer, the key
To life's puzzle before me, the lock, the closed door.
I've stopped trying to know, trying to see
Past what is going on, let it happen as planned before.
I now realize it is like trying to hurry, trying to peep,
Trying to reach the end of a riveting story,
Before the pages are turned, before the twists become deep,
Before the suspense has mounted, spoiling the read.

Life

Self indulgent lies
words that defies
Encapsulated
Ineffective Isolated
I plead clemency
A never ending odyssey
Life
With many a guise

Me

Endless chattering,
But words left unsaid.
Transparent, clear,
But an eternal secret.
Positive, cheery thoughts,
But forever depressed.
Making friends easily,
But grouchy at best.
I'm utterly inconspicuous,
But I stand out from the rest.
Oh, I'm so much like you,
Except for the "but".

Me

Thousands of accusations
quadrapuled confusions
Love hate guilt
Into unresloved mess,
Enmeshed
Am depressed
Embittered dismal
looking for approval

Lost - II

Men and women appear, all the time.
They laugh, they smile, they chuckle.
They save every nickel, spend every dime.
They kill a butterfly, admire a honeysuckle.
Annoyed by a cat's mewing, they enjoy the church bell's chime.
They party hard, and work harder, till they buckle.
They confess, kneel before the Lord, then commit many a crime.
They are actually angels in disguise, yet alarmingly fickle.

Men and women lose a little everyday.
They sob, they whimper, they cry.
But, ultimately, no one ever manages to stay.
Lost among the graves in the graveyard,
Crimes forgotten, good deeds erased from minds,
Just remembered as they who passed away,
They who watched their lives pass them by,
Having walked through life without knowing the way.

Lost - I

The parents living separate lives,
In agony, anger, frustration and misery,
The child is shuttled between two homes,
Allowed to feel no sense of bonding or family.
He's lost in the jungle of a cruel, loveless life.
Clandestine meetings with his father's parents,
Having a weekend visitor, whom he once called "Daddy",
And watching the parents fling hurtful words
At one another, draw blood and kill verbally,
The lost and lonely child shakes his head sadly.
He says, life's not at all for those who love or marry.

Lost

Empty corridors
Non existent lore
Echoing silence
Unrelenting vigilance
Suspended in time
No reason no rhyme

Surrender

She told him softly, a soft, caressing breeze,
What she wanted, what she fervently desired.
But he burned bright, a steady bonfire,
He tried to come up with smoky reasons
That, he hoped, would cover her wants in a haze.

She threw shrewish tantrums, a forceful, hurtful gale,
She accused him of hurting her, of not caring.
He wasn't ready to put out his ambitions, furiously burning.
She always wanted something, he retorted hotly.
He stood firm like the typical upper-handed male.

And then, her lips quivered; she shed tears, the endless, relentless rain,
Beating down upon him, the poor man who was previously so fiery.
He looked at her, his eyes softening; he was no longer wary.
He embraced her with both arms, accepting her needs as his own,
Male pride strongly put out by the tears of a beautiful woman so vain.

Surrender

Attuned to the nightly croon
Witnessed by the luminous moon
Feelings berserk , thoughts unsaid
Trustingly with you I tread
Amidst nudges and knowing glances
Accompanied by frenzied dances
Bedecked with jewels, clothes so fine
Shyness, Heady like a wine
Forgotten past beholden future
My beauty my charm.. my coaxing allure
For you,
On the virgin bed
With bowed head
In all my splendor
In your arms, I surrender

The Desperado

The people who came to where I worked - the Casino -
Were interesting and came in all shapes and sizes.
Wherever in the morning they might go,
In the evening they culminated right there.

They asked for many kinds of things.
Glasses traveled from table to table.
Here the men who win become kings,
The story of each victory becomes a fable.

That's how a desperado's story became.
I've got a very special story to tell you all.
The story of the man whose life was a game,
The man who gambled and won it all.

That beautiful, balmy evening, on duty,
I saw him. His was the perfect poker face.
His smile was mild, his eyes were wary.
He was determinedly winning every race.

His skin was covered with beads of sweat
From all the action and careful winning.
He was narrowly escaping loss and debt.
Who said gambling was sinning?

As orange juice and stronger drinks circulated,
The man seemed to lose himself more and more
To the game. I watched him, fascinated,
As his game touched my very core.

He won that game, and the next too, of course.
And soon, he stretched and yawned, as if
All the gambling and winning for all the hours
Had tired him. From the beer next to him, he took a sip.

Just as he was playing, his eyes met mine.
It was, by then, the middle of the night.
He'd, after all, come here only to play and dine.
Still, I couldn't help, but notice his good looks or his height.

I went about my own business, all the while aware
Of his gaze on me, the smile on his lips.
He hadn't left yet. I wished I could just stand and stare
At his hands slowly playing with the colored chips.

The next time I noticed their game, I saw
He'd lost once or twice. I was surprised;
I heard the roars, the taunts, the guffaws
Of all the players, playing cards and rolling the dice.

Soon, he was caught up in a big mess
And I made worried rounds with my plate
Around his table, pretending business;
I was wondering at the abrupt change of fate.

He never gained more after he'd lost some.
I wondered what had distracted him from his game.
After he'd entered the Casino, had things begun to hum.
I didn't want him to lose; I didn't want him to be tame.

His eyes never left me, though.
And his smile never left him.
My eyes loved to watch him so,
Though I did act almost prim.

Finally, I couldn't bear him losing
Anymore. I kissed the rim of his refilled glass
And took it to him. He knew what I was doing;
And I knew - he was already in love with this lass.

Then how he tamed the game, and made it light
And easy, and how rich we became, are all history.
And I left the Casino, on that beautiful, balmy night,
To join my beloved desperado in blissful matrimony.

And we lived together happily ever after!

Desperado

Oh Desperado
How long will you run
From reality for fun?
Quit.. Quit this bravado

Oh desperado
Back there you have left
A wee girl so bereft.
How can you be incommunicado?

Its time to face.
Life is not race
Think of that lace
Go back .. go back to that place.

Fighting demons
Of your past.
Do not lose...
Love that will last
Forget.. forget the el durado
Oh desperado...

Quit quit this bravado..
Forget the el durado

Weathered Charm

Divinity - I didn't quite believe
Till I'd seen it with my own eyes.
I just never did want to leave
The old temple, almost touching the skies.

It was almost dilapidated,
Yet I was drawn to it so.
I loved what I usually hated;
It was so beautiful with lamps aglow.

The pillars were countless in number,
All sturdy, dependable and strong.
The doors were of the finest timber.
The bells rung a solemn ding-dong.

The peace took my heart away,
The silence rocked me gently.
I would love to visit everyday.
Oh, how that would satisfy me!

The very atmosphere hugged me,
Welcomed me with open arms.
It was there, clear, for all to see,
The very place possessed a special charm.

Weathered Charm

Countless rivulets
of kindness
Wrinkles...
A jewel that tinkles

A heart of gold.
A smile that holds
many stories untold.

With a child in her arm
bosom.. moist and warm
Ah a weathered charm

Insanely Love

She knows of the other woman.
She knows whom he goes to at night.
But still she shares with him her bed,
Her life. Oh, don't you feel sorry for her plight?
She knows he loves the other woman.
He probably loves her, too, in his own wild way.
The hope exists. Worse, she still waits.
She knows he belongs to her only for the day.
She has the power to burn him down.
She knows she does. But there is love.
And where there is love, there's pain.
She is obsessed with him, and how!
She knows he will never belong to her
Fully, completely. But there's consolation.
He doesn't belong to the other woman, either,
She knows. Therein lies her satisfaction.
So she lives on. She waits for him to come to her.
Her mornings are for him. She loves him,
Clothes herself with him. Oh, the insanely way
In which she adores him, till the light goes dim.
Then it is time for the other woman to take over.
Pain in her heart, and tears in her eyes,
She leaves him. Oh, the game of hide and seek
The sun, the cloud and the moon play in the skies!

Insanely Love

"Dont come near me
Can't u see?
you will burn
Shun me shun!"

Flame said.

"Embrace me hon
Feel the need
Gimme the fatal kiss..
Feel the bliss"

Said the moth.

"Insanely love you've got
i cant do it i love u a lot
How can i think of the effect
When nothing of you will be left"

Flame wailed.

"Nah dear dont b sad
There r many more "moths" to be had
I wont disappear but in you
This is my love.. this is my due"

Moth persisted.

"If that is your wish, come on be with me
Let my fate
Be to wait.. to b lonely
You will get your glory..
coz you see
With you.. in love I happen to be.."

Flame said with arms wide open.

Insanely love..
Or limitless love.
I do not know
All I see is a writing moth
In arms of flame caught.

Afterglow - II

The evening, soft and glowing,
Brings me outside our home.
As the time endlessly ticks by,
Minute by special minute,
I know I should share the beauty
And I beckoned him to come.

Dusk, beautiful and dim,
Now clothes the plains.
As the yellow-orange light
Illuminates our home, our garden,
We realize we're forgetting our sorrows,
All our worries and pains.

Sunset, brilliant and breathtaking,
Now descends on us both.
As the sun slowly disappears,
Beneath the invisible straight line,
We watch, together, the sea,
The foam and the froth.
The evening, now dark and cold,
Stretches into the night.
As we make love, slowly, languorously,
And as the golden sunset covers us both
With its tender blanket, its loving wings,
Everything is just perfectly right.

The stars, glittering and dazzling,
Fill the blue-black sky above.
As we stretch, lazy and smiling,
The stars' silver glow illuminates us.
I see in his eyes a new, glowing myself -
Not 'cause of the stars, but with love.

Afterglow - I

After all is said and done, -
And the doing part was great fun! -
He's sleeping, breathing evenly,
His arms hugging and holding me
In a warm, loving embrace.
I look at his dear, beloved face.
And when he opens his eyes,
And looks at me, clear and nice,
I know what, on me, he's seeing,
It's lovemaking's special feeling.
Now, why he means so much to me, I really know -
'Cause he's always given me a wonderfully special glow.

Afterglow

Golden hue, birds few
Passion replete
Deep blush, Feelings rush
In the afterglow
Languid and mellow

Broken Dreams

The little child who didn't get the toy she asked for.
The slightly bigger girl who watched her bicycle
Being sold, right before her tear-filled eyes.
The young, innocent girl who felt constantly out of place
In a world that was just a wee bit too fickle.

The girl who couldn't make too many friends,
And just couldn't belong anywhere. The girl who could never
Please her father even if she tried too hard.
The girl who let go of her dreams of becoming Daddy's
Little girl, knowing they wouldn't come true, ever.

The girl who didn't get the marks she deserved.
The girl who did not study what she really wanted to.
The girl who watched her talents go unrecognized.
The girl who was never loved back by the one man
She loved with all her heart, like all romantic teenagers do.

As I kept turning the pages of my photo album,
I could clearly see the changes I'd gone through.
The same girl, sitting and watching the filmstrip
Of her life moving before her eyes. The album was only
A collection of my broken dreams, only too well I knew.

Broken Dreams

Innocent wee little gal
Playing with her pal
With bucket and scoop
And shoulders adroop

Oblivious to sun
Having lots of fun
Complete with the tassle
Voila.. a sand castle

Soon the tide rises
We have no surprises
Poof goes the sand
Labor of little hands

Broken hearts,
broken dreams
Whom to blame
whose is this scheme?

I Want To Break Free

I used to belong to this woman
Who adored me, nurtured and petted,
Held me close and listened to me talk.
With love and the utmost care, she abetted
All my actions, and all my thoughts.

I was free to speak my mind.
I was free to tell her what I felt
About every situation she faced.
I was free to burn with rage or melt,
Whenever I chose to react.

She listened to my voice,
And made decisions accordingly.
I was important to her, indispensable.
Anything that hurt her, hurt me.
We were very close to each other.

When she turned eighteen, unexpectedly
She lost me, and I was separated
From her. All of a sudden, I belonged
To someone else. It was ill-fated,
For he never wanted me at all.

I was broken, with self-pity and hurt
When I heard that quite willingly
She'd lost me to him. I wanted to go back,
But I'd lost my way. Unfortunately, he
Didn't care what happened of me.

I want to break free of this man's hold on me.
But she who was, to me, like a mother
Had lost me forever. Here, I watch him
Love another woman, possess another
Woman's heart, with joy and eagerness.

I cry, thinking of that one woman
To whom I once belonged. The woman
Who cared for me, cherished, and protected.
She broke me with her love for the one man
Who would never love her, till the end of time.

I Wanna Break Free

Anguished expressions
Shattered illusions

I wanna break free

Broken dreams
Moody extremes

I wanna break free

Tormented feelings
Regimented thoughts

I wanna break free

Suffocated fettered
Words unuttered

I wanna break free

Unfinished unresolved
Suppressed before evolved

I wanna break free

Uninhibited unshackled
Everyone I would rackle
Each danger I would tackle

I will break free

Echoes Of Silence

After the storm that raged mad,
And tore my resistance away,
Silence reigns. And peace.
All the excitement makes me sway.
In tiredness? Or in attraction?
Even now, I know not what.
After all the fury and fierce activity,
I still want more than what I've got.
Am I asking for too much?
Oh, I'm just too addicted to it all!
Give me more, take more from me.
Please don't let things fall into a lull.
After our screams that pierced
The silence once again, and again,
There's calm and peace, once more.
Silence echoes aloud our parting's pain.

Echoes Of Silence

A silent scream
A bad dream..
nightmare

Wake me up
Some one dare
Spare me.. spare!

Every time i remember
that touch that smell
The day i experienced hell

my cross to bear
All my life
My death knell

My tortured sigh
someone hear in silence
my helplessness

As i laid that night
Silence echoes my fight
my plight!

Silence echoes
Scot free, he walks away
echoes till this day

Silence echoes
My lost innocence
At nights in dreams ..

Night, witness to my pain
Driving me insane
within my heart...

Silence echoes,
My silent scream
my broken dreams..

Silence echoes....

More Than Words

A simple touch,
Holding of hands.
It's nothing special, as such.
But it still means so much.

A kiss on my forehead;
Your eyes meeting mine;
Wiping away the tears I shed;
They mean more than the words you've always said.

I don't need you to say, "I love you"
Every minute of the day.
Just hold me close, like you always do.
I'll understand how much I mean to you.

More Than Words

The way you touch
Tells me so much
much more than
Your words even

I know you are shy
I know you try
I know I see
But you dont need to honey

Read my eyes
Hear my breath
We dont need words
We love each other till death

Everytime we hold hands
Every time we stand
Togather against the world
Words we can't afford
For feelings that means
More than words

How can we contain this feeling
which no one can attain
Do not try dear do not say
Let you heart do the work today

More than words
more than life
more than dreams
more than death even

Our feelings dear,
Our love is all i believe in
You are all i believe in
More than words

Summer Wind

Hot summer, filled with hot kisses.
My first love, filling all of my vacation.
The one man who stole my young heart.
Feelings of happiness, contentment and elation.

The sun smiling at us from behind the clouds.
Making love on the warm beach sand.
Just swaying, holding each other close,
To romantic music played by some unknown band.

Kissing his hair, touching my skin,
The summer wind, priceless and timeless,
Playing pranks with my skirt, making him smile,
Caressing us both, as our eyes met, in silence, wordless.

The end my vacation met with, like all good things did,
With one heat-filled night, one kiss signifying finality.
Memories of him, his tanned skin, the devilish glint in his eyes -
The one love of my life which, close to my heart, will always be.

Summer Wind

Unbridled frolicking
Popsicle streaking
faces happy
In that summer :-)

Me toddling behind
where ever you went
immersed and entwined
together.. where the river bent

That summer and many other like it
hiding in the loft.. playing hide n seek
I remember
The scent of you
in that smoky magical afternoon
As the wind passed by

Summer winds
witness to the lost innocence
Times when we were friends
summer winds
caressing me
Brings back heady romance.
Brings back ..
you

Wave

As wave after wave touched the shore and thrashed,
Mindlessly, I watched the foam form and disappear.
My mind kept recollecting, recalling, unabashed,
Recollecting old times when even waiting was bliss.

Two hours for just two minutes together -
Heaven, pure heaven. Touches, caresses,
Kisses - as light and as soft as a feather.
I missed them all, but did I miss him?

I wished I'd lied to him about love.
I wished I'd pretended everything was all right.
I wished I hadn't searched something above
And better than what we both shared.

He found what we had perfectly adequate.
But to me, it all made no sense at all.
How could something almost non-existent sate
My deepest needs, fulfill my deepest desires?

Wave after wave of memory in my mind
Endlessly, determinedly kept pursuing one another.
Slowly I could realize we were just being kind.
Kindness does not even come close to love.

"Do you want passion?" my friend once asked me.
Then, I could have answered yes, truthfully.
Of course, I wanted passion, now I could see clearly.
I needed friendship, kindness and love, but with passion.

Yet another wave touched my feet softly
And receded, retracing its steps backwards.
I'm like the wave, I knew - searching relentlessly
For that one love I could gift all my tomorrows to.

Wave

There it comes with its might
On this lonely misty night
Happy in its own sojourn
Not caring for the forlorn

Slowly rising in crescendo
Down it comes crashing
Leaving behind
Passion.. feelings unbridled

Waves, of days bygone
While my heart yearns...
For respite,yet another rises
prisoner heart, Of its own device.
Damn you! begone!

Stormy Weather

The clouds have all gathered,
Everything is quite dark and gloomy.
The horizon quickly darkens.
Equally quickly, so does the sea.

Where are the shades of blue and green?
Everywhere, a hundred shades between white and black.
The dull, dreary grays have replaced the bright hues,
All around, across the sky, across the tracks.

Where are all the birds that chirp endlessly?
Gone are the pleasant sounds of the summer.
Now we've got only the whoosh of the wind,
And the thunder, like an excited drummer.

Where are all the stars that used to squint
Tirelessly, like rich, polished diamonds?
We've got a sky that is a blanket of plain black,
The lightnings appearing like temporary ribbons.

Where is the longing for a tall glass of iced tea?
I only need a warm cup of coffee to curl my fingers around.
Where is the weariness that envelops me, making me sleepy?
Hurry home, I need just you, to love with a passion newly found.

Stormy Weather

Trees swaying
dancing in fury
Hand of god visible truly..
swishing wind scaring.. all who have sinned
The church bells go crazy
The vision goes hazy
With our eyes skinned
We look at thee
Oh lord in your glory
Forgive our follies
The birds in tandem
Raise their voices.
Accompaniment to the storm
Various noises
The wind changes direction
calm... time for regernation
The rains stop
Silence pin drop
Then the clamour rise again
The fear was all in vain
As the new shoot rises..
The world rejoices...

All Or Nothing At All

You tell me you love me,
But 'love' just doesn't seem enough.
I'm just letting things be,
Because I know there's just no stuff
Between us, to grow and to thrive.
We're just two friends, lost and lonely,
And without you, on I'll definitely live.
And, of course, so will you, without me.
"Love", when it does come,
Will come with a pompous show.
It'll strike, not just one or some
Part of us, but so totally, and us both.
"Love", when it does arrive,
Will seat itself at both our hearts.
We've yet so much of our lives,
Let us, for a few days, stay apart.
Because, I don't want just the word
To make sense, when I fall
In love. Because, for me, love
Only means all, or nothing at all.

All or nothing at all

Tell me your innermost dreams
Your fears ..
the world as it seems
I want all or nothing at all

Tell me how much you love me
how much you miss me
tell me you cant live without me
tell me tell me all!

give me your insecurities,
all your fallacies
give me all ...
I want all or nothing at al

lI want you joys your sadness.
I want to hold you..
In my arms you can find madness
Forget your worries forget all

Reach for me when you fall
Reach for me when you are lost
reach for me in troubles soo deep
Reach for me in you sleep
I'll be there whenever you call
Reach for me

Share with me.. your life
I'll be there in every strife
I'll be there in your happiness
I will share
Let me hold you let me care
I want all or nothing at all

All The Way

I was sitting in the slowly moving train,
And I waved to my gradually disappearing parents.
My face, with all the crying, looked strained.
My husband held my hand and smiled at me.
Sadly, I looked out through the window.
I felt unhappy and lonelier than ever.
Now I've got no one that I've always known.
Then I noticed that someone, my friend for life.
She was looking at me from behind the clouds.
She smiled at me, her fair face unblemished, peerless.
And she kept her word - a word not spoken aloud,
But she kept her unspoken word, and traveled with me
All through the night. My eyes never left her face.
Her presence was reassuring, soothing, even therapeutic.
She never left my sight, even as the train took pace.
My moon friend, who loved me and stayed with me,
All of the night, all through the journey, all the way.

All the way

Walk on honey
Take that one step more
Do not quit now
Move for the one you adore

I wait
Since eternity
For you
Oh mon diu!

Do not be scared
Do not walk away
For your love.. your dream
Walk all the way

Over come
all the dangers
Stretch yourself to zenith
Walk wid strangers

Come to me honey
To the lands so sunny
I am waiting
Come all the way

Come and take me
In your arms
all my charms
Are for you.. come n see

Come my love
My darling
Be daring!
Come all the way!

All the way..
Come come and say
I love you
But first come..
before i die
Come all the way

A Kiss In The Rain

As the rain drops fell,
Noisily, incessantly,
I watched, fascinated,
As two green leaves, slowly,
But surely, bent and bowed
Towards each other.
That's the one most breathtaking [nature's] kiss in the rain
Whose memory, with me, will forever remain.

Kiss in the rain

Drops of water in the pane..
Surging passion in my veins..
Smouldering need in you eyes
And reflected in my sigh

We tried hard to contain
it was not us but the rain.
Lost in wilderness within the shack
We shared a night till the crack...

searching and yet not meeting.
The gaze relentless in its seeking..
the golden haze of smoking fire
indicating of consequences dire

And yet lost in our own dance
Waiting for a unheeded chance.
We waited seeming for eternity..
it was but for an opputunity.
Accepting the inevitable.
And yet waiting for the conceivable...

And then it happened like a dream
Corny as it may seem
We kissed senseless in the rain
We tried hard to refrain
Since that day we have been togather
Oh it was a kiss forever

Forever And A Day

I'm just yearning for that day
When I'll break away,
And spread my wings,
And not worry about trivial things.

The day will finally come,
When I'll get rid of some
Old scars; Plastic surgery?
Oh, why not? Definitely!

It'll be the day to mark new beginnings.
It'll signify the death of my few failings.
On that day, I'll just learn to love myself.
I wouldn't have to hide my fears on the shelf.

Oh, all this will happen someday,
And then I'll shout a merry "Hurray!"
That'll reach the skies; for I'll stay
Perfectly free, forever and a day.

Forever and a day

Magic in the dawn
Chirping birds on the lawn
Wasn't it perfect
On that special day?

And yet i didnt see the birds
nor the flowers that unfurled
Coz i was looking out for you
You. my honey.. my world...

eyes lost into eyes..
hands enclasped never to let go
in every gesture..in every sigh
love.. you did show..

That day.. do you remember ?
You promised me ... forever
enmeshed with me in heavenly dance.
Bliss in every glance..

It is again a magical dawn
birds are still in the lawn
and I wait for you.. yet
You have long passed away..

Its been an year since that day.
When lady love scorned my way
Love is lost so are you..
Borrowed joy lost like the morning dew..

The Lady Of The Night

I stand amidst a thousand others,
Yet I stand out, separate and alone.
People know I'm just a flower that withers
After just a night of passionate blooming and rising.

He's someone who doesn't know about me,
Someone who has never seen me before.
But yet, he picks me out from the crowd.
Perhaps because, on me, the fragrance is more?

Oh, those from my class tend to do that.
Spreading fragrance and pleasure is what we're for.
The someone I'm waiting for loves me for just a night.
He comes to take me, to worship and adore.

And then he appears - just the golden
Moon from behind the clouds. He smiles,
He takes my hand, and tells me where and when.
I smile back, I know what a night it's going to be.

Everything is just as I wanted it to be.
I kiss, I touch, like a shy, virginal bride.
I show him all the heights he wants to see.
And then, with a smile, I sleep in his arms.

Now is the time to open my eyes,
To find him next to me, to smile at his sweet face.
But he isn't there - and then, my hope dies,
As my eyes fall on the tattered fifty-rupee note.

I'm, after all, the flower that blooms for a night;
Paid for to grow, to smile and to then shrivel
To the floor. But I know I'll bloom again. For tonight -
For another man, another time, another fifty-rupee note.

Lady of the night - II

Nay do not grieve for the tortured sigh ,
Not while I am in your arms...
Kiss me senseless i wont fight
For I am the lady of the night!

Nay do not stop for dawn is nigh..
Farmers already left for the farms....
We are here on borrowed moments,
And yet my love flows in torrents.

Nay, oh luminious moon, do not go..
Lets try and fight your foe
The shining sun ever so bright...
Mocks,On my distressed plight!

Nay do not stop its time to go
Don't look back at my woe,
Magic in the night, I do unfurl...
I am but an helpless girl..

Nay do not let the love bites hide
In the light of sparkling tear
Nor forget the night's wanton cheer...
The final offering.. Of your one night bride!!

Lady of the night - I

The moon is shining bright
But can it match the sight?
Of my reflection?
Oh.. Urvashi's resurrection!!!!

Jittering nerves n broken pride..
Glittering adornment doth hide
Tears of pearls r n vanity abide
The soiled .. anybody's bride

Oh what wouldn't i give
To b back to poet's hut...
In his arms my eyes shut
And not in this ostenious rut

But I am lady of the night
How can I light
Someone's hearth...
I am blighted... since birth!